On Period(s) - Part 1
Essential to the survival and thrival (the act of thriving) of any man who plans to live with a woman:
Understanding menstruation
Knowing what to do about it
Before I took the time to study up and understand this I had preconceived notions that were cemented in my brain. Maybe it was TV, commercials, or just other ignorant fools that “taught” me about it but the only things I thought I knew were that women bleed, they get irritable or downright scary, and that periods are called “that time of the month” for a reason.
I can say for a fact that knowing the information I’m about to share with you has changed my life, and our relationship, for the better. (BTW none of this is groundbreaking material, you can find any of this stuff on the internet but luckily you are taking the time to search it, so you’re already on the right track).
In this 4 part series, we will go into depth (with simplicity) about each of the different phases/cycles of the period. We will also discuss ways to make it better for you and for her because though she’s the one experiencing it, you are experiencing her, therefore it’s a team sport.
Part 1: Menstruation Phase (The Actual Bleed)
Part 2: Follicular Phase
Part 3: Ovulation
Part 4: Luteal Phase
After you finish Part 1, stick around and check out Parts 2-4 in separate posts by clicking above. Each is important and will help you as well as your lady.
Part 1: The Menstruation Phase
Here are the basics, some of which I’m sure you know but hey, a lil review never hurt nobody! We’ll be using the correct terms for everything so don’t get weird about it okay? We’re adults now, man up!
The name period comes from the Latin periodus which means “recurring cycle.” So once a month, starting at puberty, the lining of her uterus will shed (this includes blood and cells from the uterus) and flows out the vagina. This lasts from 2-7 days depending on the woman. No two periods are the same, some are light and easy, and ladies can still run five miles on it. Others have something called endometriosis which causes the woman to bleed with much more intensity and causes severe pains laying them up for days.
Symptoms She’s Dealing With:
Abdominal or pelvic cramping.
Lower back pain.
Bloating and sore breasts.
Food cravings.
Mood swings and irritability.
Fits of depression.
Headache.
Fatigue.
Helping alleviate any of these symptoms are helpful and can ease the situation but let’s go into depth on some of the most important things you can do to help support your lady through this experience.
What To Do About It…
Empathize
Let’s get graphic for a minute. Can you imagine shedding the lining of your penis and the muscles around it are working to push all of the excess out? The first thing you need to do is not act like you understand and assume that they can just “suck it up” or “get over it.” First, try to understand. The pain is real, fatigue is real, and depending on the woman, depression is crippling. Ask questions about what it is that she specifically is going through so you can treat those symptoms
Don’t Get Butt Hurt
This one can be tough for most of us because we don’t like getting snapped on or yelled at. I completely understand that. Not every woman will be screaming or throwing things at you, but they will be quicker to get irritated, easily annoyed, or upset. Not saying walk on egg shells but pick your battles. She is in pain, inside and out, so allow her to have her feelings and emotions without getting offended. Do you mean everything you say when you’re mad? Give your lady grace and push through the tough conversations.
FEED HER WELL
At this time, she is losing a lot of iron, so increase foods rich in iron. Make it balanced with plenty of leafy green vegetables, fruits, and legumes. Try food that warms the inside ie: soups, stews, noodle bowls etc. Many Asian cultures focus on this throughout a woman’s life, especially during menstruation, pregnancy, and postpartum. Warm the womb my friend.
Clean & Stock Up
Maintain the house. Clean the bathroom, take the trash out regularly, cook good meals then do the dishes, make things as easy as possible for her throughout this process. (This works when not on menstruation phase too!). Stock up on her favorite products! Know her specific type of pads, tampons, and liners, Costco them thangs and have em ready BEFORE hand. But E, how do I know when?
Track It
Get you a period tracking app on your phone. This isn’t sponsored but I use My Cycle and check it regularly. Just be in open communication with your lady and when she starts, log it, when she ends . . . yep, log it. This way you can plan ahead and be prepared with cleaning, groceries, products, and even mentally. This is also helpful l for knowing when you want to get pregnant or if you don’t! It projects the expected date of your her period for the next YEAR! (Some months can be shorter or longer though so be sure to log it to keep it as accurate as possible).
